It sure feels as if we now live in a post-happiness world. And we all know whom to blame — the guy who has lived rent free in our heads for so long, who dragged us into this low point in human history:
Dan Gilbert, the Harvard psychologist who published his wildly popular book, “Stumbling on Happiness,” in 2006 and went on to sell Prudential life insurance on TV.
If Gilbert had just kept his pesky thoughts on happiness to himself, we wouldn’t now be flooded with advice on how to be happier — whatever that word means.
What is happiness, anyway, beyond a sense, fleeting or permanent, of deep-rooted well being? If you really want to get to the bottom of the overmarketed concept known as happiness, the Stanford Encyclopedia of Philosophy offers this 12,000-word disquisition.
Whether you're a brother or whether you're a mother
You know what the next line is.
And that line is truth, is it not? Here on AGING with STRENGTH, I’ve investigated and analyzed the definition of that word — strength — through many different filters: physical, emotional, cognitive, nutritional, spiritual and social. Next month, once everyone’s back from summer vacations, I’ll post my deep dive into achieving and maintaining sexual strength, too. (Expect a paywall on that one.)
But, let’s face it. On many days, for many of us, it’s enough to just accomplish the simple act of stayin’ alive.
Life goin' nowhere, somebody help me
It’s in these specific moments when gratitude comes in, kicks happiness in the crotch, cracks a non-alcoholic beer and offers a poignant reminder that, given the state of the Gilbertian (Gilbertonian?) world we’re all now forced to live in — filled with happy talk, happy meals, happy warriors, happy hours, happy holidays, happy mediums, happy trails, happy birthdays, happy babies, happy valleys, Happy Days, happy coincidences, happy feet, happy hunting, happy returns and, not least, happy endings (which should also be paywalled, in my opinion) — when your 82-year-old mother emerges from an unintentional ass-backwards cartwheel at the local playground without sustaining an injury…be grateful! Be very grateful.
Feel the city breakin' and everybody shakin'
That pretty much describes the mise-en-scène as I watched (and filmed, given my Zapruder-like instincts) my mother lose her balance, fall backwards downhill, land on her back, spin 180 degrees and roll down that children’s slide. (The video keeps her granddaughter’s face intentionally obscured, to preserve her privacy). My immediate reaction — beyond the compulsion to keep filming until mom reached the bottom of the slide — was major, sustained gratitude for no broken hips, concussions, fractured wrists or other injuries that could have, in all seriousness, derailed her life.
And now it's all right, it's okay
Notably, my mom’s singular response was to laugh her ass off. Like she was happy or something. In a week filled with mortal frustration on many levels, I have a lot of gratitude for that laughter, that joy, that resilience. The episode reminded me to continue acknowledging, daily, all that I have to be grateful for.
That may be the best way of them all to age with strength.
What’s your gratitude strategy?
Share this post